Love
Make room for Me…. For Love, throughout your day.
As your heart center warms, radiance beyond measure spills over
& blesses all beings I send your way.
Like the highest string of a fine violin, your love will move others to reach for our melody.
Hear me softly singing to you…..
IAM all that your are….. LOVE.
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Is there any subject that has been written more about than love? There are love poems, love songs & love letters. Epic novels of sweeping love stories or photo journals of our love for animals and nature. This story is about a Valentine that resurfaced the day before my beloved’s funeral. A story of love that binds two souls: One living & the other, only days before, killed in an accident.
It was early morning, sometime around 4am, that I found myself sitting alone in the dark upon a favorite living room chair. I had been awake most of the night, my mind spinning thoughts of grief into heart pounding fears of my life without him. Just two days ago we sat side by side, legs crossed over each others, watching a Chicago Bulls game. We sat outside under an old quilt & a big moon, as the game played on, speaking only when commercials interrupted our quiet pleasure. I don’t like sports much, but I loved being near him.
The next morning, while returning to town, he drove his car head on into an ancient oak tree, severing his aorta and dying instantly.
Two days later I’m sitting in the dark trying to put words on paper to express what his life meant to me and our girls. I didn’t want the morning sun to come up or the coffee pot to click on. I just wanted Robert to walk around the corner, or call my name. Beginning a new day without him was meaningless and oh so empty.
Deciding a cup of hot tea would bring some comfort, I stood up and began my way to the kitchen. Suddenly, something felt odd around me and I stopped. An unusual sensation began to surround my mid section. The feeling was warm and it did not frighten me. It felt like a soft rope encircling my waist with a lead extending outward. Some unseen force began pulling me forward from the waist leading me slowly across the room.
What was happening? What is this energy surrounding my waist and guiding me across the room? Where does it come from?
I managed a slight resistance, mostly out of fear of the unknown, but the tautness of the lead never ceased and my curious nature took over. I felt a sense of urgency rise up within me. Where am I being drawn to?
Slowly I crossed the kitchen, then dining room, clueless of where I was being guided. The house was still dark except for patches of moon light upon the old wood floors. Dodging furniture, a floor lamp and coffee table, I find myself at the far end of the living room….standing in front of a chest like end table. The sensation of the ‘rope’ was still present, but I also sensed I had arrived at ‘its’ destination. What am I being shown? What will I find here?
I noticed the drawer with the two brass handles and pulled them. I rarely open this drawer except to extract long tapered candles for an occasional special dinner or Christmas napkins in December. The energy around me became more intense, more directed. My hands began to shuffle through items in the drawer….. This time I said out loud, ‘What is in here? What am I looking for?’.
There were assorted old school papers, holiday items, and match books piled upon what seemed like a meaningless mess of discarded mail. As I finally reached the very back of the drawer, underneath years of discarded papers I found one precious item. And I knew then I had found what I was being pulled to….. what my heart was being drawn to.
It read as follows…..
From every human being there rises a light that reaches straight to heaven. And when two souls that are destined to be together find each other, their streams of light flow together and a single brighter light goes forth from their united being. BAAL SHEM TOV
Upon opening this 1995 Valentine from Robert, I found his message to me. What he had been trying to show me. This is what he wanted me to know.
I never dreamed we’d find such a wonderful love together.
Robert 14 Feb. 1995
Happy Valentines Day
The force that had surrounded my waist quickly faded as a wave of deep love & devotion dropped over me like a warm shawl. I gently slipped to the floor, holding the valentine in my hand and wept. Grateful that I was being shown how love does bridge two worlds. And that souls can be destined to find each other & form a sacred union. And most importantly, I was being shown that Love transcends death.
We are love & we never die.
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I went back to read this today Mom. It’s beautiful. I cried. I’m still teared up 🙂 I read your words from my current perspective of being your adult child, but then I also remember being there, your child, and his daughter :). It’s an interesting feeling. Through your stories I get to understand for a second time new meaning. Thank you for writing them 🙂
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And so are you! Thank you for taking the time to write a comment. They mean so much.
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Simply beautiful. Unconditional love is the greates gift we can give and/or recieve. You are an amazing creator.
Love you!
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